Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Stick What, Where?

We have a little guinea pig. Well, hold on...we have five guinea pigs. Let me start again.

One of our many guinea pigs, Flash, is ill. We placed him in the pig pen in the family room to play on Sunday- yes, I said pig pen...you know, like a play pen, for guinea pigs- and he began to run around playfully when he suddenly stopped, squatted, and sprayed blood everywhere. We all looked on, silently mortified.

After a short search, Dr. Google had me convinced that our little piggie had a urinary tract infection. We consulted with our vet who assured us he could provide a guinea pig-safe antibiotic so I took him to the vet today. (As in, I took off work and drove the guinea pig to the vet because the Big Guy cannot bring himself to handle a rodent.)

And that is when the shit hit the proverbial fan.

The vet promptly mixed up seven syringes of diluted antibiotic and taught me how to inject them into the squealing little piggie. 

Um...you want me to stick what where

The vet expects me to inject this...

Into this:

Let me just give you a little perspective here. 


Seriously, the actual needle is longer than the piggie's ear. I'm supposed to 'pick up' a bit of skin on his backside (have you ever tried to pick up a bit of guinea pig skin?) and slip the needle in parallel to his skin and inject. Just like that. Six more times. Except that I'm afraid he'll get all pissy (because I'm pinching his arse) and wiggle or jump and I'll spear his liver or spleen or something. 

Or maybe myself. 

Pray for us. 

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